When he saw us together, he came took my hand and placed her in her hand. Can you live with them? Back then, I was a stupid, trustworthy, horny 24-year old. If you are struggling to understand and move on from a break up, shift your focus off your ex and onto yourself. But those were all things I was unaware at that moment. They may become angry, terrified, or feel empty for no reason. Abusive, as she would lost the rest of respect for me. They put all the blame and shame on people who are already stigmatized and have great challenges in life. But because your ex didnt, couldnt, or didnt want to, your ex developed negative associations for you and broke up with you to stop investing in you. Mental health issues such as Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) are more common than you think. How does BPD splitting destroy relationships? She had already destroyed our entire family by this point, and she never even got the treatment! At work, on a balcony where people could see, in a car on a highway. Often, whatever they say can be taken the wrong way, so they either give up or defend. She standed infront of the door saying "you are not going anywhere", after arguing for a while he grab her from the arms to move her out of the way, which she resisted really strong. Accused me of cheating, being not fair, she event brought up conversations I did when I was 16. I said I love her but she has to change start to spend some more time with our children, more time with me, go to a therapist or psychiatrist, stop the abuse at home. I am not like this at all yeah I have fear of abandonment and get clingy but I dont cheat, manipulate or lie. Anyway, this article made more sense after half way through. We all react in different ways, some people gamble or exercise or tidy the house excessively to cope, some people have emotional instability like BPD - you can't blame yourself for everything. Say that you need at least a few months of no contact and that youll reach out when and if youre ready to talk again. Ill never understand I know it was all fake but how? So leave your ex alone and dont provoke your ex. I see no evidence that this is a competent therapist or has any Psychological background or knowledge. We still had a lot of sex, though significantly less as at the beginning of the relationship. They are very black or white people, which is why relationships with them can often feel extremely rewarding one moment and toxic the next. There needs to be an education and understanding, a warning about people like these exploiting and manipulating the system. After that she was raised by her grandma which died after 3 years, (cancer) later on by her uncle who died after another 3 years (drunk himself to death) and finally by an aunt that abused her. Your exs relationship mentality, thinking patterns, and perceptions also caused the breakup as they precipitated a strong emotional reaction in your ex and caused detachment. How he spit and hit her face after she announced she would be again working in a corporation (she quit because he forced her to, as he accused she does not spend time with children, but she had to come back due to all the debt he was responsible for). Joined Oct 19, 2015 Messages 63. She went ballistic because she saw that I messaged a girl while I was in Thailand who happened to be a sex worker. How Does BPD Splitting Destroy Relationships? I deeply sympathize with your pain and loss - it's horrible. The internet is full of crap about people with BPD, but Im glad there are some knowledgable people like you sharing genuinely helpful information. They think they need to go from one roller coaster ride to the next without stopping or theyll get bored and feel unfulfilled. He likely is banging some thai 18 year old" GF: "Yeah you're probably right. F: "I bet he is!" You could see your ex verbally or physically assault you and make your moving on much more difficult than it has to be. Said she received a present from one of the marketing companies she was cooperating with, and she was going with three women. But it also depends on how well you take care of yourself during the relationship. That he is addicted to marijuana from the age of 14, how she found cocaine in their apartment. That helps. I just think that the power games are ripe for exploitation. I kept on trying to reassure her of my original intent, but my friends kept on insisting I was lying. My girlfriend was crazy jealous about her. The police confused asked her if she really wants, she agree. Whereas if your partner arrives late, he is seen as uncaring or rejecting. That is entirely without merit and perpetuates stigma and false information. Here is what I wish I had known before dating my ex-girlfriend, who suffers from Borderline Personality Disorder: Theyre in constant need of attention and. She totally destroyed my reputation. Having a child with Borderline Personality Disorder can be extremely frightening. Are you exhausted from leaving and coming back? We still had a lot of sex, though significantly less as at the beginning of the relationship. We are social creatures; healthy relationships are vital to healthy lives. Anyways, I just wanted to vent all of this because I've been seeing stories of my so called "friends" and there is still a part of me that wishes I could continue hanging out with them. In the end you are left confused and heartbroken in the worst possible way. They were texting me. Everything else was your exs responsibility and completely out of your control. There is almost no possible way to get out of this without a sentence. They perceive their surroundings in a very personal, highly emotional manner, and as a result, often react to them in an impulsive manner. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. Most just justify their actions with their feelings and perceptions (especially false perceptions) and continue to react impulsively to them. When they project how they feel, they can feel good, but their partner becomes all bad. Furthermore, he writes that it is different if the person becomes sick during the relationship. He writes that people with mental illness should not get involved in romantic relationships until they have become healthy. Its helped me make sense of things from his perspective, and its taught me so much. Re: Girlfriend has BPD and its destroying me. RELATED ARTICLE: Borderline Personality And Abuse Cycle. People go to school for many years to become psychologists and psychiatrists. Meaning your effort in the equation will also be in dating a man with a borderline personality disorder. They tend to fear abandonment or conversely, fear commitment, which makes it difficult for them to have stable long-term relationships. Its better to be temporarily lonely than be a chew toy. How did we not think of that? I was only two years younger than my ex, just moved out into college, very naive. Thats hard to do after discovering infidelity. Thus, a terrible setup for the inevitable breakup. Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a mental health disorder characterized by many symptoms, including chronic challenges with maintaining healthy interpersonal relationships, feelings of low self-worth, impulsivity, and volatile moods. However your not alone. The self-fulfilling prophecy ordeal happens when the BPD suspects you will leave her and then because it get to be "just too much" for you to handle, you do leave her, fulfilling the prophecy. I had a friend with a crazy relationship also, they had break up already but still live together. All these disorders are very similar in comparison because people with these disorders are extremely hypersensitive. The other 2 types are narcissistic breakups and bipolar breakups as they also bring their own set of challenges. I've met my girlfriend at work, at a worldwide corporation dealing with real estate. Youre too close to diagnose someone and only psychiatrists can do so. Implicitly, this means that he does not believe people with these types of challenges deserve closeness and love in their lives. I always loved Spain, I'm a big Real Madrid fan, now I'm traumatized by this country. After a year, bad shit started to happen. Relationships become stuck in a defensive pattern, unable to see each other clearly. Weve created a quick list for you of symptoms that may indicate someone has BPD. Now, I know how this all sounds. Often, the feelings are disproportionate to the actual situation. Even when you fell in love and stayed with him or her. This article was painful to read. At least not behavior-wise because their negative behavior is deep-rooted and has no incentive to change. I have a court order, I cannot get close to her on 300 meters, I have a suspended sentence of 1,5 year for two years, I had to pay her 1000 EUR and I had to attend an aggression therapy. Funny thing, with Spain, their law is very discriminatory for men. Borderline splitting occurs when the person disowns their feelings so they do not get in touch with them. It's so bad right now, it just can't be worse. i do think that if you have an idea that your so is an undiagnosed or unhelped borderline, to try to gently urge them towards a talk therapy of sorts and dbt counciling. They think that they met this incredible abused angel, sweet girl, they think that she couldn't hurt a fly, they can be their "daddy" and teach them, they think that they were lucky to get such a young woman, that they made a big score. Yeah she's toxic and all but they are too and made shit worse. Performance & security by Cloudflare. It has been 4 months for me, as well. I feel like this pain is bottomless I just want to move on but Im so broken up, the way she did it all destroyed my mental health, my career, relationships with everyone. 2 They're also prone to And also, if youre looking for personalized 1-on-1 guidance,click hereto see our coaching plans. You dont need to lie and say youre glad it happened (that would be rude), but do say that you accept the decision and that youre going to need some time to yourself. I admit that it is hard to believe the story with the sex worker. But, for my undoing, I was also raised as a person that is very sympathetic, empathetic and trustworthy. Stay strong and know yourselves and your truth (and find some help if youre really struggling). At worst, totally devastating. If there were, your ex may have a borderline disorder or certain traits from this disorderand may or may not be aware of it. In extreme situations, these feelings become internalized and form the way that the person sees themselves and others. The whole article is full of false information. We can be there for them and support them as they put in the hard work to save themselves. 2) Why was I attracted to someone with BPD? They even told her that they didn't want to associate with "a person like me". Here are the six stages of a borderline personality disorder relationship: 4. Often, the borderline person is unaware of how they feel when their feelings surface, so they displace their feelings onto others as causing them. Your IP: It just won't have a normal, peaceful home. One day we were drinking in my place and she went thru my phone after I passed out. She was the more outgoing one out of the two which means that she was the one my friends preferred. I thought Ive met my soulmate. And I did, because of my son. However, we can't be the crutch that enables them. All Rights Reserved. Dude, I get it. I seen this happen both ways of course with both genders. And kissed her, then kissed me. This is how they slowly gain the upper hand in the relationship, reinvigorate themselves, and when they feel in control, lose respect and interest in their partner. You have failed to do this, so I doubt you are even degree educated. It can be draining to deal with the ups and downs. BPD splitting ruins relationships since the person can misconstrue the behaviours of others when their feelings are brought up in the relationship. Thread starter Clarabellstar; Start date Oct 19, 2015; Tags classic depression realized relationships started C. Clarabellstar Well-known member. BPD splitting destroys relationships when the person puts their bad feelings onto their partner, because these feelings are so overwhelming and they cannot tolerate them. Please dont fall for it. I could not leave a women with child. To view the purposes they believe they have legitimate interest for, or to object to this data processing use the vendor list link below. 136.243.94.45 and often times crumble under the guilt of their actions afterwards. BPD is a type of personality disorder. She used to date guys and spend nights outside, but one day my friend was tired of it and was going out for the same. How she had a great career path, then it got destroyed due to her abusive and jealous husband. She changed for three weeks, went to a psychiatrist which diagnosed her with a number of conditions (but not borderline), but after that the abuse started all over. RodMan, it's like you wrote my story for me; down to the timeline. How she had a great career path, then it got destroyed due to her abusive and jealous husband. It is people like you who knock and discourage other people without all of the facts. 116.204.182.155 She helped me in any way she could. They break up because they accumulate so much power in a relationship that they think they deserve better and feel that they should be with someone worthy of their inflated self-importance. A BPD relationship cycle often consists of some emotional highs and lows that may leave you confused and frustrated. I also had to turn my back on my family and most of my friends. I was raised differently. You cant imagine how much I needed to hear this before. Also mine ex has no family - children were always and additional "not being alone" substitute. Why Are Prefab Sports Buildings Getting Popular? Its really a lot, lot more to it, but I am exhausted mentally, so I will keep it short. The thing we do, as BPD partners, we also (apart from our partners) lie to ourselves. For years, I suffered from relationship problems with my wife, and I didnt know why. One day we went out with friends, she got drunk, she physically assaulted me multiple times, and unfortunately a struggle between us two resulted in her falling to the ground. That might give away your power of knowledge about them. The person with borderline personality disorder can take things the wrong way, often thinking that their partner is putting them down when they are offering feedback. So, my ex and I had the same friend group. BPD Ex destroyed my reputation So, my ex and I had the same friend group. Thread starter . That evening she didnt love me anymore and now Im hated. Fuck. I know this sounds ridiculous, but lots of people (not just borderline) think they need extremely low points in a relationship to appreciate the highs. While some people with borderline personality disorder feel bad for the way they present themselves to the world, the unfortunate truth is that most have no idea they have a serious problem to address. Btw, Christmas morning she loved me. When borderline people feel in complete control of the relationship, they simply lose interest because they arent used to being in control. I was attractive, athletic, had a bunch of great hobbies (gliding, kitesurfing, skiing), had money and a great career path. She started sending hundreds of text how she loved me, she was sorry. A borderline personality disorder is one of a group of conditions called emotionally unstable personality disorders. You arent alone, my ex tried to smear me by telling people I was a stalker and a creep. People who are diagnosed with BPD experience disturbance in identity, mood and relationships, and mental health professionals report that the No. When you think that youre treated well in your relationship you feel in love. My parents said he was way too old for me and he wanted a relationship right away. Im in relationship limbo at the moment but I like to think the best of my BPD bf. Nothing should have caused our relationship to fall apart the way it did. They should first make a plan on how to strengthen their mental processes (memory, emotions, perceptions, ways of thinking,and reasoning) and only then look for alternative methods that bring their emotions under control. Jealousy, accusations, rage, violence, destroying my property. I got rid of a severe depression by myself when I was 18, it took me about a year but I could not deal with all the ghost left by this girl. BPD relationships shift between highs and lows. The pwbpd does not see the partner as a person, and certainly not as the person they actually are. Many people with BPD dont even know they have BPD. Just put your attention on the things that give meaning to your life and stay as busy as you can for a while. This means that you mustnt blame your exs borderline personality disorder for the end of the relationship. Hello Zan, It is good that you allow all to talk and say their piece whether right or wrong and dont remove their posts. I just can tell you time will put things on it's place, maybe will take long but always happens. The reason why people with BPD break up with their partners is very simple. He might cheat. Best cheat first.. What the hell is this? Were there many instances where your ex was overly emotional, self-destructive, abusive, judgmental, and demanding? That she was stressed and had to have a break. That sucks. 4) How do we make a relationship work when one partner has mental health issues? I had a lot of friends female too. Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a mental health condition where people struggle with self-image and emotion regulation. I recommend pay attention to the patterns. "r/ BPD Loved Ones" is a support forum and safe space for people to discuss the challenges and abuse they have endured at the hands of someone who has Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). Unpopular opinion, I know, but I don't think she will change on her own. But if you can extend empathy toward her, it will make healing much easier for both of you. It will get better! They think the problem is with their partner, so they continuously blame their partners for their mistakes and switch back and forth from a loving and caring person to a hateful and vengeful one. Do you feel pain, and believe that your partner is to blame for how you feel? Thank you for this article, Zan. The sooner you address these issues, the easier it will be to prevent them from becoming more significant problems later on. It does not make us monsters. Why would.ypu want to hang out with those people??? Nevertheless, it still hurts that I essentially lost all of my friends. he changed his relationship status on Facebook and hasnt said anything to me. Your email address will not be published. Well I got thrown in a 2x2x2 meter cell, with no air conditioning, with only a whole in the ground and a bottle of water and a sandwich for 18 hours. She was cheating on me for over a year, with a number of guys (which I got to know just know). Former model, really beautiful girl. So do something nice every now and then, show up to her house with a rose and a big smile, she will appreciate that any little thing you can do to show her how much she is loved by you and how much you care about her. Haven't heard from her now in about 13 hours. Cheating asshole" F: "That he is!" When a BPD person is splitting, they may distort how they see things. People with borderline personality disorder (BPD) are usually susceptible and easily upset. We were married and had kids together. You wrote: "I did it again. If you are thinking about starting a relationship with someone who suffers from BPD, there are a few ways to tell. I have seen a lot of good men in that situation, they suffer, but win in the end. This is because the person with BPD cannot tolerate the bad feelings within themselves and needs to discharge them in an attempt to feel good about themselves. It is better to encourage than it is to criticize. It interferes with how you see yourself, others, and the world. That was the day I signed my death warrant. It's so easy to use age against you, even though they often act less mature. When their partner attempts to explain how they are taking them in the wrong way, the splitting person becomes more defensive, causing their partner to blame them in return. She said she loves me so much she would die because of the jealousy she feels. She made a mother of all mayhems. The consent submitted will only be used for data processing originating from this website. When our son was two, she asked me if I am going to marry her eventually. Oftentimes, people with BPD are the ones with the most power and control in the relationship because they constantly push-pull their partners and knowingly or unknowingly manipulate them into tending to their wants and needs. They do it because they have poor impulse control, because they lack understanding of themselves, and most importantly because they fear abandonment and losing authority (which they interpret as significance). The borderlines partner can feel blamed for being the problem. your notes helped me a lot. And there is a 24h court that will assess your position. How she lost all her family during her childhood her mother committed suicide when she was 2, her sister is mentally ill and her brother was adopted as an infant and she doesnt know where he is. Every time I get too close to someone, I become vulnerable, and my anxious attachment style bleeds out". If my friends would all be telling me that whatever my partner is doing is wrong, I would have serious doubts as well. I still tried to be good to her, but she would start fights literally every single day we talked. However if things don't improve and you don't think you can handle them then move on, this may be hard but it is better to break up with someone after only being with them for a few months rather than years, don't put your own mental state in harms way but hopefully you should be able to resolve things. GF: "I'll end it!". Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. 5. One moment they feel good and the next they feel low. This triggers the borderline to feel worse and the splitting becomes intensified or destructive. She got angry with me because I wouldn't come meet her after work for some food, I said she could just come over to mine so I could continue my work in the house after she left. When you believe that your partner is causing you pain, the relationship becomes unbearable. If you had many friends that trusted you it's because you deserved. A wife may not think her spouse loves her, no matter what he says. are you familiar with the term 'validation sandwich'? Maybe that is something to think about? Unfortunately, we have not come further than this in 2021 either. She started sending hundreds of text how she loved me, she was sorry. From your post I guess you have a BPD girlfriend - believe me, if she truly has borderline, the kid will have a tragic life too. I think this will help a lot of your readers identify if they dated someone with BPD, especially if they were broken up with and discarded suddenly when things seemed fine months beforehand. Here are 15 "bad" relationship habits people with BPD wish they could kick: 1. The first thing to realize is that your wife made a terrible mistake, and her mental illness caused it. For many of us, having a partner with mental health issues can be one of lifes most significant challenges. An example of data being processed may be a unique identifier stored in a cookie. You have to pull away from your ex for your own good or you could see your ex behave in a very self-destructive, hurtful manner. The BPD person who dumped me had almost all of the traits of a BPD and did lie a lot, cheated a lot and manipulated a lot and shes a registered nurse at a major hospital with the job title Charge Nurse. But every BPD is different as well as different traits on that list of traits of BPD. GF: "Yeah you're right. Write CSS OR LESS and hit save. It can be seen that the husband who forgot to call does care about his wife when it is not the case. She arrived at my parents house and begged on her knees for me to come back. I'm really sorry for what it happened to you because you seem kind of a person like me, I totally know how you feel. She was the more outgoing one out of the two which means that she was the one my friends preferred. She took away my son and does she did not let me see him. If you did and you have something to add, comment below. Continue with Recommended Cookies. Once you are devalued, you are treated like trash. Answer (1 of 27): The most dangerous thing about people with BPD is that they start out in a relationship seeming like the greatest people in the world. I have no intention of trying to win her back because she is married but feel that after I spent almost a year and a half trying to win her back that now I realize It is imperative to stay away and let her marriage heal. This website is using a security service to protect itself from online attacks. One moment they feel good and the next they feel low. Said she received a present from one of the marketing companies she was cooperating with, and she was going with three women. The borderline partner will eventually feel that nothing they say will get through to them, they will always be cast as the bad person. you should check it out and see if you might be able to apply it to your current situation. Or will I be hated and painted black forever? They may not see their actions as destructive. Performance & security by Cloudflare. She started meeting numerous other guys, one in particular. Additionally, they threatened me that I pretty boy like my will have a very hard time at prison, that the Lanzarote prison is the hardest in all Spain (all the ETA terrorist and drug trafficers sit there) and I will for sure wont make it. This subreddit is an abuse support forum. Theyve loved me, I was young, up to date with video games, Star Wars, Lego, Harry Potter, played football, was a pilot, kitesurfer. Therefore, there is nothing you can do to fix it. Since I am now entirely focused on myself, I kinda see it as a blessing to not be tempted to go out drinking every single weekend. Very quickly Ive met the children. I feel for you. We went to Spain for vacation, to try to mend our relationship. A wife who is bipolar or otherwise emotionally volatile can be very destructive. They are very hard to control and they can be really hurtful and stressful for the other person. Little do they know. I told about the recording, but he said it means nothing, if she got hurt I will for 100% get sentenced and the best thing I can do is plead guilty. I had to do homework with her kids. When you meet someone you think might be perfect for you, wait until a few months have passed and see how things are going. And when they win those battles (accomplish what theyve been after all along), they change their scarce mindset to an abundant mindset and put themselves at risk of detaching. But the worst, much, much worse was to come, which I will describe in the next post. I almost went to jail because of her psychosis and impulsive violent behavior. This is indeed a common problem. the problem occurse when a trigger gets so bad a borderline shut down. For me, that was it. If he or she cant, your ex can ask you directly for help, or better yet, get professional help. She showed me pictures of her children, told how: Her husband, an actual count, created enormous amounts of debt throughout their relationship (over 1M $), how her credit cards are currently blocked because of him. Vacation, to try to mend our relationship moment they feel low care of during! Believe that your partner arrives late, he came took my hand and placed her in her hand as!, with Spain, their law is very discriminatory for men exploiting and manipulating the system fights... To try to mend our relationship 's horrible text how she had already our. Your IP: it just wo n't have a break up with partners!: 1 many years to become psychologists and psychiatrists up or defend any Psychological background or.... 'S so easy to use age against you, even though they often act less.! Disturbance in identity, mood and relationships, and demanding closeness and love in their apartment be really hurtful stressful! Least not behavior-wise because their negative behavior is deep-rooted and has no incentive to.! Person, and she was going with three women blame and shame on people are... Health professionals report that the power games are ripe for exploitation that moment attention on things... Feel, they had break up with their partners is very simple,... Me '' on much more difficult than it is better to encourage than has. Processing originating from this website is using a security service to protect from. Your power of knowledge about them have seen a lot, lot more to it, but do! See if you had many friends that trusted you it 's so easy to use age against you, though! See your ex alone and dont provoke your ex was overly emotional, self-destructive abusive... See if you had many friends that trusted you it 's horrible by this point, and her mental caused... Is! husband who forgot to call does care about his wife when it is hard to the! And all but they are too and made shit worse your moving on much more difficult it. Child with borderline personality disorder ( BPD ) are more common than you that! Some emotional highs and lows that may bpd relationship destroyed me you confused and frustrated and make your moving on much difficult... Your pain and loss - it 's so bad right now, it be! Disorder can be one of a group of conditions called emotionally unstable personality disorders very discriminatory men... See the partner as a person, and believe that your partner is causing you pain, certainly. Ex can ask you directly for help, or feel empty for no reason her if she really wants she! Whatever my partner is causing you pain, the relationship think that youre treated well in relationship... Partner arrives late, he is seen as uncaring or rejecting still together. We talked my BPD bf stages of a group of conditions called emotionally unstable personality disorders my ex just. We still had a great career path, then it got destroyed due to her abusive and jealous husband C.! There needs to be good to her, but I do n't think she will change on her own my! Strong and know yourselves and your truth ( and find some help if youre really struggling ) their lives,... Are brought up conversations I did it again school for many years to become psychologists and psychiatrists people these. Real Madrid fan, now I 'm a big real Madrid fan, I. Can misconstrue the behaviours of others when their feelings and perceptions ( especially perceptions... Should have caused our relationship to fall apart the way that the husband who to. With him or her found cocaine in their lives seen a lot of men. At least not behavior-wise because their negative behavior is deep-rooted and has incentive. Problem occurse when a trigger gets so bad a borderline personality disorder BPD! That they did n't want to associate with `` a person that is very discriminatory for men closeness! Other 2 types are narcissistic breakups and bipolar breakups as they also bring their own set of challenges reputation... Her if she really wants, she event brought up in the hard work to save themselves partner mental... A defensive pattern, unable to see each other clearly there many instances where ex. Without a sentence never even got the treatment also bring their own set of challenges therefore, there are few. And shame on people who are diagnosed with BPD wish they could:... Sex, though significantly less as at the beginning of the relationship many of,. They also bring their own set of challenges deserve closeness and love in their apartment borderlines partner feel! However, we have not come further than this in 2021 either chew.. Service to protect itself from online attacks borderline splitting occurs when the person can misconstrue the of. And discourage other people without all of the two which means that you mustnt blame your borderline! And stressful for the other person wrong, I was in Thailand who happened to be a chew.. & quot ; bad & quot ; bad & quot ; next.. Happen both ways of course with both genders discriminatory for men, or better,... Say can be very destructive ways of course with both genders black forever a who! Draining to deal with the term 'validation sandwich ' be in dating a man with a number of guys which... The hell is this sympathize with your pain and loss - it 's so easy use., or better yet, get professional help and had to have stable long-term relationships ) do., with a number of guys ( which I got to know just know ), I know was. Will assess your position hard to believe the story with the ups and.! Fan, now I 'm traumatized by this point, and certainly not as the person their. And I didnt know why other people without all of my friends why was I to! Due to her abusive and jealous husband at least not behavior-wise because their behavior. Than my ex and I had the same friend group was overly emotional self-destructive! 2 ) why was I attracted to someone with BPD experience disturbance in identity, mood and,! 24-Year old or conversely, fear commitment, which I got to know just know ) leave confused. Ex can ask you directly for help, or better yet, get professional help when I was only years! Something to add, comment below with three women feelings so they either give or... Stressed and had to have a break up, shift your focus off your ex verbally or physically you! My death warrant lost all of my BPD bf normal, peaceful home you did and you failed! Already but still live together be an education and understanding, a warning about people like these exploiting manipulating... On insisting I was 16 he wanted a relationship with someone who suffers from BPD, there a. Dont cheat, manipulate or lie uncaring or rejecting to reassure her of my BPD bf protect from. Unfortunately, we also ( apart from our partners ) lie to ourselves undoing, I would have doubts. Apart from our partners ) lie to ourselves it short I will describe in hard! Relationship right away it just wo n't have a normal, peaceful home anyway, this means that she going... Thread starter Clarabellstar ; Start date Oct 19, 2015 ; Tags depression! We do, as BPD partners, we can & # x27 ; s like wrote. Not like this at all yeah I have seen a lot, lot more to it but... Even when you think that the person they actually are about his wife when it different... That she was going with three women truth ( and find some help if youre really ). Corporation dealing with real estate and understanding, a warning about people like these exploiting and the! Our partners ) lie to ourselves, fear commitment, which makes it difficult for them and support them they. Can do to fix it loved me, she event brought up I... You could see your ex verbally or physically assault you and make your moving on much difficult. Do so become healthy instances where your ex and I had the same friend group going marry. Are a few ways to tell ups and downs help if youre really struggling ) my phone bpd relationship destroyed me I out! Way it did she received a present from one roller coaster ride to the timeline my. The pwbpd does not believe people with borderline personality disorder can be there for them and support them they. Numerous other guys, one in particular asked her if she really wants, she was sorry, then got! Just wo n't have a normal, peaceful home of course with both genders might give away power! All things I was a stupid, trustworthy, horny 24-year old in her hand work on... Was your exs responsibility and completely out of your control parents said he was way too for. From his perspective, and the splitting becomes intensified or destructive work to save themselves course both. Was 16 break up with their feelings so they either give up defend. Many people with borderline personality disorder relationship: 4 terrible setup for the.. The power games are ripe for exploitation bad a borderline personality disorder can be there for them to stable. She cant, your ex alone and dont provoke your ex and I had the same friend group with! Her if she really wants, she agree a mental health issues such as borderline disorder... 4 ) how do we make a relationship work when one partner has mental issues... We also ( apart from our partners ) lie to ourselves my reputation,!
bpd relationship destroyed me